Verses 11-14
“Then Judah said to Tamar his daughter-in-law, “Remain a widow in your father’s house till my son Shelah is grown.” For he said, “Lest he also die like his brothers.” (Judah remains determined in honouring God’s ways concerning the raising up of an heir for a deceased brother by the wife he leaves behind, whilst on the other hand also remaining mindful of the fact that God can in His sovereignty strike down whomever he wishes whenever he wishes – as He has already shown Himself strong – according to His good will, purpose and pleasure. It might seem as if Tamar, as a woman, has very little say in the matter, but we must always bear in mind that in God’s Perfect Narrative the bride – always ultimately exemplifying The Bride of Christ – will always be perfectly, covenantely, securely protected and provided for, if not by a Husband then by a Father: there truly is no safer, more comforting or endearing place to find rest than in- and under this precious covering of God-appointed authority.) And Tamar went and dwelt in her father’s house. (I cannot help but strongly identify with the trials of dwelling in one’s childhood home as a grown woman with no other option but to patiently wait in Faith for one’s God-appointed husband to arrive; Trusting and Hoping in the Lord that one’s child-bearing years will not pass by before the appointed time when all one longs for is to be able to set up a home of one’s very own, caring for and being loved by a husband, filling that home with little ones and bringing them up in the ways of the Lord 😢.) Now in the process of time (notice how the phrasing of the Scriptures here subtly exalts the Lord as the Author and Finisher of time – time being a mere pliable tool and obedient servant in His hands) the daughter of Shua, Judah’s wife, died; and Judah was comforted, and went up to his sheepshearers at Timnah, he and his friend Hirah the Adullamite. (Let us not forget that Judah has now lost two children and a beloved wife. The fact that his comforting is not stated in the continuous tense alludes to the fact that he was sufficiently comforted and that his grieving has at this point in time come to an end. Despite the fact that it concerned a much more trivial matter, I myself have recently taken note of the fact that grieving is indeed a process one passes through for a season but that once that season has concluded it is almost as if the wound has healed completely and one is once again fully restored unto the state of being one found oneself in preceding the loss, only stronger for having survived the fiery trial. It is also worth bearing in mind that the Holy Spirit is Our Comforter and His work is all-sufficient and complete. The fact that the comforting and the mentioning of the friend in such affirmative terms is narrated so closely together also suggests that Hirah was a dear and close friend and was most probably also responsible for a great deal of the comfort provided 😌.) And it was told Tamar (the vagueness implied here alludes to the fact that the information most probably reached her via the gossip-mill: it was not given her officially by a messenger of the Lord nor by someone in authority – either Judah himself or by her own father – and the fact that she was almost certainly at this point tried by much confusion, impatience and doubts; desperate for confirmation or a sign, as I can understand only too well, this almost certainly paves the way for the making of poor decisions 😣), saying, “Look, your father-in-law is going up to Timnah to shear his sheep.” (I am not entirely sure what the shearing of the sheep symbolises here but I can imagine at the very least that it must point to the arrival of a new customary season of some sort and that the resounding silence surrounding her agreed upon betrothal to Shelah must have proven to poor Tamar that she ought to perhaps now take matters into her own hands. I believe it is of some importance to note here that surely the male authority figures in her life have failed her miserably at this point – though most assuredly not apart from God’s Sovereign design – by failing to communicate anything to her; most probably having forgotten about her completely whilst she sits and waits dutifully in much anguish 😕.) So she took off her widow’s garments, (enough is enough for surely all signs very literally point to the arrival of a new season – why should Tamar continue in her garments of mourning that she has had to shamefully bear for many years if even Judah is able to conclude his season of mourning so very succinctly 😐) covered herself with a veil and wrapped herself, and sat in an open place which was on the way to Timnah (where she was sure to meet Judah on his way . . ); for she saw that Shelah was grown, and she was not given to him as a wife.” (Tamar has reached that point where it truly seems that the breakthrough will never come and she will now hatch a plan in her own strength – thankfully in his Mercy and Lovingkindness God continues to make all things work together for our Good whatever silly things we get up to 🙇♀️; as I’m sure our Sarah would also happily testify 😉.)
“11Then Judah said to Tamar his daughter-in-law, “Remain a widow in your father’s house till my son Shelah is grown.” For he said, “Lest he also die like his brothers.” And Tamar went and dwelt in her father’s house.
12Now in the process of time the daughter of Shua, Judah’s wife, died; and Judah was comforted, and went up to his sheepshearers at Timnah, he and his friend Hirah the Adullamite. 13And it was told Tamar, saying, “Look, your father-in-law is going up to Timnah to shear his sheep.” 14So she took off her widow’s garments, covered herself with a veil and wrapped herself, and sat in an open place which was on the way to Timnah; for she saw that Shelah was grown, and she was not given to him as a wife.”
– Genesis 38:11-14 (NKJV)